What you need to know
Romance scams are becoming more common, and they can have a huge emotional and financial impact. These scams usually start online, where someone pretends to form a romantic connection before slowly manipulating you into sending money or sharing personal information.
Just like pension and investment scams, romance scammers are getting better at what they do. Their tactics can feel very believable, which makes them harder to spot.
What is a romance scam?
A romance scam happens when someone pretends to build a romantic relationship or friendship with you so they can win your trust — and eventually your money. Most of the time, this starts on dating sites, social media, or messaging apps.
Scammers often use fake identities, stolen pictures, or AI‑generated images to make themselves look real. They’ll spend weeks or even months creating believable stories and building a connection before inventing a crisis where they urgently need money. Their aim is to manipulate your feelings and logical thinking by some of the following tactics:
- Making emotional declarations very quickly, creating rapid intimacy.
- Avoiding video calls or in‑person meetings, claiming to work abroad or in the military.
- Inventing serious emergencies like requesting money for medical issues, visas, travel or investments.
- Steering conversations away from the original platform to WhatsApp, SMS or specific messaging apps.
- Using fake or stolen profile pictures.
- Encouraging secrecy to isolate you from friends or family who may question the relationship.
How to protect yourself?
Don’t be rushed into a relationship
Scammers often push for fast emotional commitments. Take your time getting to know someone.
Be cautious if you haven’t met in person
Repeated excuses for avoiding video calls or real‑life meetings are strong warning signs.
Never send money to someone you haven’t met
Whether it’s for travel, medical bills or investment opportunities, financial requests are likely to be fraudulent.
Protect your personal information
Don’t share product information, PINs/Password, ID documents or intimate images. These can be used for extortion or identity fraud.
Verify any details they give you
Use open-source information, where possible, to understand whether the details you have been provided with are genuine.
Talk to someone you trust
Trusted friends and family can help spot red flags that may be hard to see when emotionally invested.
Stay on reputable platforms
If someone attempts to move conversations away from secure sites, be cautious.
What to do if you think you’re being scammed
If you think you’re dealing with a scammer, you should:
- Stop sending money immediately.
- Contact us — we may be able to stop a payment.
- Contact your bank or product provider.
- Report it to Report Fraud or Police Scotland.
- Keep evidence of conversations, names and payment details.
- Speak to someone you trust who can give you impartial advice. Often scammers rely on secrecy and emotional isolation.
Support
There are also a number of support agencies you can reach out to.
Citizens Advice
Citizens Advice is a national organisation offering free, confidential, impartial advice, to support victims of scams, particularly those who are struggling financially.
Victim Support
Victim Support is an independent charity dedicated to supporting victims of crime and traumatic incidents.
Samaritans
When life is difficult, Samaritans are here – day or night, 365 days a year. You can call them for free on 116 123 or email them at jo@samaritans.org.
If you do find that you're a victim of a scam you should be extremely cautious of any future contact from someone purporting to be able to reclaim funds lost to a scam, as it's highly unlikely that an unfamiliar person will legitimately contact you for this reason.
You should question how they've found your contact details and should check they're genuine by verifying their contact details from an independent and reliable source. You can find out more in this article from report fraud.
Find out more
Financial Conduct Authority
The Financial Conduct Authority provides information to help you avoid investment and pensions scams.
Which?
Offering independent advice Which? have been championing consumer rights since 1957.